Testing Page of Doom 7!

Who Cares How Overdue It Is? It's A TPoD!

	Guess what guys? Great news!
	What, you've rested enough to use Astral Transport again?
	Er, yes, actually. Why don't you sound terribly excited by this?
	Because ZeX came back.
	He what?!
	Yo.
	What the... but... I thought...
	Yeah, sorry about making you all run around like that, but...
	Sorry? I use up some of my most powerful magic to try and find you to figure out what's going on, then you just show up on your own, and think saying you're sorry will make everything better? Well, I've got news for you, bub!
	Um, please don't hit me with that big, powerful spell...
	*KABLOOOEY!*
	OW! What the fuck was that?
	Level 1 Nuclear Obliteration.
	That was level 1?!?
	Yeah, if I'd used anything above level 10, you wouldn't be solid, let alone standing. You pissed me off, but not enough to deatomize you.
	Um... thanks?
	I suppose that's as close to an apology as we're likely to get, then.
	Right, now's the part where you explain why you thought having us run on wild goose chases was a fun idea.
	*Sigh* All right...
AFTER SOME PAINFULLY LONG EXPOSITION....	(DURING WHICH NOTHING OF CONSEQUENCE HAPPENS, BUT ZEX EXPLAINS WHY HE LEFT THE FORUMS)
	I suppose I can't disagree with any of that.
	Really?
	Well, I'm still mad about the wild goose chases, obviously, but you make a perfectly valid point. We shouldn't be so openly hostile to new members, or those not blessed with perfect spelling ability.
	I think Slyvena's corpse would have a few choice words to say about that.
	That situation was completely different. Also, shut up.
	Or AsdMaster...
	I said to shut up!
	We apologize for the interruption, but someone is attempting to gain access to the forums.
	What?
	Who could that be?
	More importantly, why are we receiving a notification announcement about it?
	Come again?
	I mean, why would somebody trying to log on be so momentous that we have to receieve a site-wide announcement? And who the hell is PixelMedia, anyway?
	Um...
	I think I've seen their logo somewhere before... Yeah, when you used Pathfinder to try to find ZeX's IP address!
	Grim...
	Who do they think they are? What do they have to do with the forums? Why don't I know anything about them?
	Grim, they're obviously this universe's omnipresent corporation, since Mage is too much of a chicken to use a real corporation's name.
	Could we please leave the fourth wall intact for five minutes?
	What fourth wall?
	*Sigh*
	*Yawn* Hey, guys.
	A-ha, a distraction!
	What about the person trying to gain access to the forums?
	What about them?
	Well, did they succeed? Or did they just give up? Why didn't we get a followup notification? Was it Murska?
	Er, no, I was logged on the whole time, I just woke up.
	Attention, access to the forum has been granted to user #6789.
	That sounds ominous.
	Indeed.
	Hello, all.
	...That's what the two announcements were about? The two ominous announcements that half made me expect Slyvena had risen from the dead? It was all just E_net4?
	Er, what?
	How anticlimactic.
	I'm so confused.
	Join the club. What the hell was that announcement?
	Apparently the omnipresent corporation of the universe decided that E_net4 logging on was worthy of two ominous-sounding announcements. We're not sure why.
	Mage, you didn't set up a notification system to warn you if E_net4 came online, did you?
	What? No, why would I do that?
	Oh? It wasn't you?
	No, it most certainly wasn't. I don't even think I can set up site-wide announcements.
	He's right there, he only has mod powers for the junk forum.
	Oh.
	So who set up the notification?
	What notification?
	The notification that was sent out over the entire site when you logged on, apparently.
	The what?
	There were two of them, in fact.
	That makes no sense.
	I believe that was the conclusion we all came to, as well.
	Attention, user #6789 is now arriving.
	What?
	Hello, everyone.
	...So it wasn't E_net4 after all?
	Uh, my user number is 1430.
	...Oh. How do you find out, anyway?
	Everyone knows their own user number.
	I'm #1116.
	I'm #1095.
	I'm #1148.
	...Huh. It seems I'm #1068.
	So, who are you, then?
	Er, me? Just a Notrium fan.
	So... a new member?
	A-ha! It all makes sense now!
	Eh?
	You don't mean...
	Yes. It's been so long since a new member arrived, the forum decided to make an announcement!
	How confusing.
	You guys are the strangest bunch I've ever met.
	You don't know the half of it.
	Now whatever you guys do, don't stab him.
	Uh... what?
	Nothing.
	Are you trying to scare him off, Idiota?
	Just giving him a fair warning.
	Riiight. Suuure.
	*Yaaawn* You people sure are making quite the ruckus today.
	New member.
	Bwuh?
	*Points at Dorten*
	Well, I'll be damned.
	I take it back. You guys are the strangest bunch anyone has ever met.
	We try.
THE END?	How will the old hands treat the "new guy"? Will they scare him off? Or can the forum actually sustain new members? Or will everyone spontaneously die in some contrived catastrophe? Find out next time!